Going through a divorce or splitting up from any long term relationship can be very traumatic, even if the relationship was a particularly bad one; it’s still a big upheaval and you are
left looking for answers to the many questions that you still have. Once they are on their own many feel lonely, depressed.
It’s easy to dwell on the old relationship and wonder if it really was that bad. After the initial shock and upset the newly single often get caught up in nostalgia, what they remember as the good times in the relationship. They forget too quickly what brought them to this crisis and point of the final separation.
As difficult as the split may be in the beginning it’s important to see the relationship for what it really was. Once you see beyond the anger, hurt feelings, and feeling of failure it’s often a start to creating a new beginning. Often it is the feeling of failure that gets in the way of people honestly seeing things for what they really are.
If you’ve split up from your partner no matter who initiated the final blow it has happened for a reason. There had to be signs whether you are willing to admit it or not. There are reasons why this break up has happened, and even if you are somewhat shocked by the finality of the relationship, it’s important to be totally honest about the problems that brought thing to a head. As difficult as it may be staying in denial and wallowing in self pity too long will only keep you from moving forward.
No matter how bad their circumstances are coming out of the relationship many have later said that it was the best thing that could have happened. Some come out of the relationship with nothing, losing their home and financial stability but can still say they have never felt so alive. A lot of divorced people are over 50, some are bringing up children alone and some have been divorced more than once. They do eventually recognize that the time has finally arrived when they decide to live for themselves; to make a life of their own; to live it the way they want to. Divorce is one of those things that affect people of all ages and walks of life.
Some over 50s start a new career or their own business, write a book, and manage to create an amazing life with their friends and family. They become more mature and find a freedom and contentment that they love. Many of the break ups are with couples that did have a number of good years in their relationship before it took a different course. It is often sad to think that you have not only lost your partner but also someone that was once your best friend and confidant.
More and more couples instead of growing together they are growing apart for various reasons. The common interests and values that they had once shared can sometimes get a far apart that there is no common ground anymore. It doesn’t mean that either party is a bad person; they have just grown into different people.
We question sometimes why is it that some people have to go through so much, and often in a short period of time? They will suffer personal loss, ill health, unemployment
and divorce yet still manage to bounce back and turn their life around. These are the people with the can do attitude, these are the ones that against all odds will make a success of their life. Sometimes it just takes a little more time and help to get to that place.
We are all sent numerous challenges throughout our lives. There will be highs and lows, tear and heartache but there will also be joy, fun and love. We need to believe in ourselves, set some goals worth having, take some chances, step outside of our comfort zone go and live life to the fullest. Regardless of being single or in a relationship the most important relationship of all is the one we have with ourselves.
It’s time to stop hurting and time to start living
If you are still finding it difficult to come to terms with the loss of your relationship you may find the course below will have the answers that you are looking for. It has been a wonderful resource and helped many people overcome the loss of their relationship and start living again.
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HEAL MY BROKEN HEART