With few exceptions, marriage can invite tribulations especially when neither of the partners is willing to give way. Traits can play an important role in the outcome of marriage. If either of the couple is extremely forgiving and understanding, problems that often make a marriage start to falter, or any relationship for that matter, can usually be resolved.
Nonetheless, if the circumstances have become repetitive and the manner of resolving the issues have only made matters worse, then being forgiving or understanding is not enough. 10 tips are provided in this article to help couples improve their relationship chances.
1. Do something new. It need not always be a major activity. Sometimes, even a simple note of thanks or expression of endearment such as “take care” “see you tonight” may surprise your partner and sets a different atmosphere or mood. At times, going out on a walk or watching a movie together can be a good bonding opportunity.
2. Plan a getaway vacation. Some time spent with your partner in another environment can help ease the tension. In fact, it can be a great way to express your love for your partner especially when you are away from pressures from your respective career, friends, family, children and domestic concerns.3. Determine the cause of the conflict. One reason why marriage fails is failure to listen to the partner’s side. Don’t take for granted that you know what the other person is thinking or how they feel about something. Perceptions are often wrong! You may have thought you knew what the other would say but you don’t know, so give them a chance. There are also incidences in which the other partner chooses not to express his/her mind and heart because he or she feels it is futile.
4. Make short-term goals. When the root causes of the conflicts are determined, working on its resolution may not always be easy. Take time to solve one issue and resolve the one that is easiest to achieve. Remember that it takes more than becoming understanding; being compassionate with your partner’s weakness and shortcomings can be a powerful tool.
5. Spend time with each other regularly. It does not need to be expensive and long although this can be helpful; however often it’s the quality of the time together that counts. For example, spending even a short ten minutes together can strengthen the bond. Such time with each other can be spent talking about one’s emotions or thoughts that may be significant to him or her.
6. Respect is Huge. Sometimes, this word is already hackneyed; however, it is one powerful trait to prevent the relationship rut. If respect for your partner and for yourself is always present within you, this alone can restrain you from doing something that would hurt your partner. Respect is applicable to emotions, opinions and being.
7. Be willing to admit your mistakes. Nobody is perfect. If you had made an error, swallow your pride and take a stand. Do not complicate things by hiding it from your partner. In cases of confrontation, be honest and sorry. Ask for a chance to be heard and understood.
8. Avoid being judgmental. Bear in mind that anybody can make the same mistake your partner may have made. Never render a conviction against him/her and make him or her feel that they are a terrible person. Take time together to resolve such matters especially the delicate ones. Be as understanding as you can be.
9. Don’t keep bringing up past issues. One of the common grounds of failed relationship is the habit of tracing back to a past mistake whenever there is a conflict. Once the past issue is resolved, it is better left forgotten. It is not healthy to constantly remind your partner about that particular mistake.
10. Never speak abusively. Regardless of the intensity of the situation or sin committed, it is best not to forget that this is your wife or husband whom you are having this argument with. The same person whom you made vows to love no matter the circumstance, condition or problems in life.
By Vanessa Tabor