Archive for Relationships
Dating and the Over 50s.
Posted by: | Comments
Once over the age of 50 many singles will feel that it’s impossible to meet that special someone. There are so many people that think this way, so they often give up on the idea of romance and stay alone. Who really wants to go into their retirement years alone? Rather than give up, if a relationship is something that you would like to have in your life; be proactive and find ways that you can meet others like you.
By the time you reach your fifties you are most likely looking for very different things in a potential partner than you may have looked for when you first started dating many years ago. This is
going to particularly applies if you are looking for a serious long term relationship.
Before you even start your search it’s a good idea to know what type of relationship you would like to find. Do you want to meet someone as a friend, or rather have a casual relationship with someone to go out with occasionally, or are you looking for a potential marriage partner?
As intimidating as the process of finding someone may seem the rewards will make it all worth it if you find a great new romance. The over 50s group are not likely to be at night clubs or hanging around bars in the hopes of meeting their ideal partner. So where will they be? Just as you are probably looking for more depth and companionship in this new partner; you will also need to look in different places to meet them. Read More→
Why Many Over 50s Avoid Getting Into New Relationships.
Posted by: | Comments
There are millions of singles that want to meet that special someone to share their life with. So why aren’t they getting together? What stops them? 
When people are thinking about getting back into the dating scene, especially after the age of 50 there are a number of major things that they think about even though they may not openly discuss them with others.
When you are young the expectation is that you will meet the right partner, build a life together and grow old together. At least that’s the way it used to be. I don’t think there are many that get into a serious long term relationship with the intention of it only lasting for a few years before they move on to someone else, especially in a marriage partnership.
If you reach your 50s and things haven’t worked out the way you had planned in your relationships it’s time to consider what you do want for your future. When you consider how many singles there are, there’s probably only a small percentage of those individuals that honestly want to live their life alone, whether they admit to it or not. Especially for those that have had the experience of a good relationship even if it was short lived.
There are things that happen along the way through your life that make you hesitant to pursue a new partner, even though deep down you may want to be in another relationship. If you have spent the past 20-30 years or so building your life with someone else, to then think about creating a life with another person that you may not have even met yet, or someone that maybe a stranger to you right now is not easy. It’s very intimidating. Read More→
How to Communicate with your Teen Grandkids
Posted by: | Comments
Communicating with your grand-kids when they are little is rarely a problem. Grandparents are the ones that seem to have a sunny disposition whenever they are around their grand-kids. They are the ones that are always ready to play or read a story, even if mum and dad have their attention elsewhere.
It your are fortunate enough to live near your grand-kids and have been in their lives since they came into the world they are going to be very comfortable with you. You will have probably baby sat them, changed their diaper, fed them and cuddled them when they were sick. But the inevitable happens-they grow up!
The teen years arrive and they turn into different people and as a parent of parents you will already know what it’s like to raise a teen. They don’t want to be cuddled anymore or sit on your lap. They have their own ideas of what type of gifts they like and what they like to eat. There’s no more getting what you like and what they used to be only too thrilled about.
Most of the time the teens today are tuned out to the older generation, they are plugged into an ipod, iphone, on their computer, or playing games. Sometimes it’s just really tough to connect with them as a parent or a grandparent. The important thing is to keep the doors of communication open even if it’s a small window they need to know that you are there whenever they need to talk or just hang out in silence.
A short while ago I got a text from my granddaughter and I don’t like to text other than in situations like this with my grand-kids (it just
takes me so long). My granddaughter asked me to pick her up from school as she had a disagreement with her parents and she was mad at them. I phoned her parents and told them what was going on and picked her up from school. We hung out together for the next 3 or 4 hours talking about all sorts, including when I was her age and how difficult it can be as a teen, but also for parents that are not sure how to handle some situations, also to keep in mind that they are doing their best.
I never lectured or said that her parents were right or wrong. I let her think about things for herself. We talked about things we would probably never have talked about if it had not been for this situation. I was so glad that she called me and I hope that she feels comfortable enough that she wouldn’t hesitate to do so again. Read More→
Over 50s Singles Looking for Love on Line–Stay smart
Posted by: | Comments
Finding and meeting new people online is uncharted territory for many of the over 50s singles. Life over 50 is very a different today than it was for our parents not to mention our grandparents. Never in their wildest dreams would they have imagined that one day people would turn on a contraption in our homes and be chatting with people on the other side of the world within minutes. When you think of it, it is mind boggling and even a bit of a stretch for many of us over 50. The way we have made friends and found relationships in the past is changed forever.
Some people are more street smart than others when it comes to the internet and the things that you need to be aware of. Some singles have a lot of dating experience both on and off line while
others that may have been in a long marriage or long term relationship are not sure what to expect. For those looking to meet new people for the first time in many years it can be very intimidating especially when you don’t know the rules.
Meeting people online has even changed over the past few years. It has become far more accepted as people of all ages are relying on the internet to meet new people for friendship, dating, business and networking. Let’s be honest when it works well its great! How else could you ever have access to so many and come in contact with people from other parts of the world other than meeting via the internet? However, it also opens the door to scams and a number of other issues that you would be far less likely to come across when meeting in more traditional ways.
While there are lots of genuine legitimate people searching profiles and making contact on singles sites, there are others that are abusing the trust of many innocent people by intentionally misleading them. Some are out and out dishonest by making out they are someone other than who they are. There are also married men and women making out that they are single, plus others that display pictures of other people making out that it’s them, it’s often a picture of an attractive and very well put together individual. Others will post old pictures of themselves from years ago. There are those that have no intentions other than getting some sort of thrill from having an online fling.
I have heard from a number of people that have arranged to meet their internet contact face to face and cannot even relate to the person they may have chatted with for weeks or months, because there is absolutely no resemblance to their profile. If someone feels deceived and uncomfortable right off the bat it’s not going to go down well.
Looks aren’t everything but being honest and upfront is. If anyone is serious about meeting someone online be honest because there may come a time when you may want to meet face to face so if you have embellished the truth, you are probably going to be reluctant to meet even though there may be genuine interest because the game will be up. If the other person is not interested in you as you re.ally are or you in them, why waste your time – move on!
Also be aware of sob stories because that happens too. There are the honest and genuine stories and we all feel sorry for someone that has gone through very difficult times, but beware; some will use a lie to tug at your heart strings. There are some individuals that will tell you how wonderful their life was until their husband or wife and child died tragically in a terrible accident or something similar. I know you will feel awful if it’s true and you discount it, but be on your guard because some of these scam artists know exactly how to get through to you to get your trust and often your personal information. Read More→
How to Revive your Relationship in Retirement.
Posted by: | Comments
Have you noticed those cute elderly couples that obviously adore each other? You know the ones that you ask yourself ‘How did they get so lucky”. They will be together for the rest of their lives. They appear to really care for each other. They watch out for each other, they hold hands while they’re out walking or crossing the road. Nothing seems too much trouble for their spouse, and they don’t huff and puff and pull faces while they are doing it. They are genuinely happy to be there for each other and have no embarrassment about showing their affection for each other.
The question is; have they always been like this? Some may have, especially if they have no children but generally I would think that they have gone through the relationship ups and downs
that most have during their life together. Many have experienced periods where relationships may have been distanced by everyday life obligations and challenges of career and family.
Do you recall those early years in your relationship where you would do almost anything for your new love? When you first meet you spend time getting to know each other. You ask questions and listen. You want to know what the other person likes and dislikes and what they want to do. You make time for them; you want to be with them as much as possible. You want them to be happy with you.
The romance stage often leads to marriage, family, and more responsibilities, often leading to less time for your relationship with your spouse, and less romance or maybe none at all. Is it any wonder that the distance grows in many of these relationships? If not recognized and dealt with this can lead to the relationship breakdown and often divorce.
If you can survive those years of work, family and growing responsibility when retirement does come around it is a new opportunity to get to know each other all over again. The fact that as we age many people do mellow could be another reason why many seniors can have such great relationships in retirement. Read More→
Grandparents – How to Enjoy Your Grandkids
Posted by: | Comments
By Shirley Price
Time seems to fly by. It’s probably not too difficult to recall the moment that you brought your own child into the world. We have watched our baby grow into an adult and have a family of their own.
As parents of parents we may have been missing having our own children around full time but we get to gain so much more joy through the arrival of our grandchildren.
Although we feel the excitement of the new arrival, often we are not quite ready to be called Grandma or Grandpa. This is a new experience for us and can be a bit challenging at times as we learn our role in this new family dynamic.
Getting used to your new role
The arrival of a new grandchild will bring the memories flooding back to the times of raising our own child. And now it’s time to discover the many ways we can enjoy our grandkids
Enjoy your grandchildren
too. We may have more time to actually appreciate and enjoy our grandchildren even though on a physical level we may come up against some challenges that were not there when our own kids were small.
Unfortunately, for some families the ideal grandparent/grandchild relationship is not possible as some grandparents and grandchildren are separated by many miles and often for long periods of time when they live in different parts of the world.
Staying Over
For those of us fortunate to have our grandchildren living closer we will probably see them on a fairly regular basis. Maybe they will even come to visit on weekends and holidays. You may even end up being a caregiver for your grand-kids if both of their parents work, or maybe a part time baby sitter while their parents have a night out. It’s always a good thing if your grandchild gets used to staying with you overnight. There may come a time when it may become a necessity to have them overnight and then it’s easier on everyone. Read More→
Divorce and the Over 50s
Posted by: | Comments
By Shirley Price
Don’t get me wrong I am not an advocate for divorce at any age. Nor am I an advocate of living a miserable life. When you know there’s nothing but misery left in your relationship and you’ve done all you possibly can to try improve the problems to no avail, why prolong the misery? To divorce is a huge decision, life as you know it will change for sure. There are those that have gone through divorce several times and for others it’s so devastating that some never really get past it.
The life you want over 50
As we get older we need to be more aware of how things are really going in our own lives. Are we happy? Because, there comes a time when we realize if there are things we want to
Discovering what's important
change we had better get on with it. As we age we see friends and family members having to deal with challenges they never expected. Some get sick and less mobile often forcing them to change their later life plans.
Discovering what’s important to you
Today more than ever people are getting divorced after the age of 50. They realise that they want more from life than they are getting, and it’s not materialistic things that they are looking for, it’s more than that. By the time you reach your 50s many have had most of the things people strive for. They realise that it’s not the material things that make you happy. Some have been in unhappy marriages for many years. Some wait until the kids have left home before they decide to do anything about it. For others it’s after they retire from their careers and suddenly find that they would be spending most of their time with this other person that they don’t even really know anymore and they decide they want out.
Relationships Take Work
I think we all want the happy ever after life and when we don’t get it we feel can feel cheated and disillusioned. Statistics say that it usually only takes about 15 months before most couples fall out of that initial first love. With that in mind you can see why relationships take work, like anything else to thrive they need a lot of nurturing.
Our relationships affect everything.
If we are happy we will be healthier and more productive and those around us will be happier too. If we are unhappy and miserable we will be stressed and anxious and less productive and others will feel the effects. The way we function in our personal and professional lives, our moods, confidence and self esteem are all affected by the state of our relationships. And yet it is one of those skills we learn on the job just like parenting. Plus, we often take what we have experienced in our own family environment into our relationships. Read More→
Concerns for Aging Parents
Posted by: | Comments
By Shirley Price
As we reach 50 and over unless our parents have already passed on most of us will start having a number of concerns about our aging parents. The degree of assistance that
Concerns for Aging Parents
you can personally provide them if and when they need it will depend a lot on whether you live close to them, also according to the level of care they may need depending on the state of their health.
When distance is an issue
If you’re like me and live in a different country to your parent(s) the chances are that you are not physically able to assist them as much as you would like. This in itself can be very stressful and a big concern for many of us. We may be able to help financially to some extent. Maybe help them with purchasing medical and mobility aids if they need them like a walker or other aids to help them be as comfortable and mobile as possible, but it’s not the same as being able to be there in person offering our personal support.
When you live far away even though you may talk on the phone on a regular basis; there can be a lot of guilt that goes along with all the other concerns. I have been very fortunate that my mother has maintained reasonably good health and at 88 years of age is fairly active and able to continue to go out on a daily basis. My mom and her husband, who she married when she was 70, continue to live in their own home. My dad passed away when my mom in her 50s. Read More→
Retired and Single
Posted by: | Comments
by Shirley Price
So… what’s next for You?
If you’ve been working really hard all these years, you may have been so focused with your job that you were not even thinking about a love life. You are certainly not alone in this world of growing singles.
Re-evaluate your Life
When it comes to that time when work no longer consumes your time it’s a good time to take the opportunity to re-evaluate your life. To know where you’re headed and what you 
want now that you have the time to make other choices. What are you going to do and who are you going to be doing it with?
Do you even want a Relationship?
Many people enjoy being single, yet I believe if most are totally honest a large percentage of those singles would like to have someone to share some of life’s experiences with either on a full time or part time basis.
Set In our Ways
As we get older many of us are set in our ways and wonder if it would even be possible to live with another person. Even if we have lived with someone previously after living alone for a long time it could take a bit of getting used to. Of course finding the right person could change everything, even your mind of “never again”! Read More→
10 Tips To Getting Out Of A Relationship Rut
Posted by: | CommentsWith few exceptions, marriage can invite tribulations especially when neither of the partners is willing to give way. Traits can play an important role in the outcome of marriage. If either of the couple is extremely forgiving and understanding, problems that often make a marriage start to falter, or any relationship for that matter, can usually be resolved.
Nonetheless, if the circumstances have become repetitive and the manner of resolving the issues have only made matters worse, then being forgiving or understanding is not enough. 10 tips are provided in this article to help couples improve their relationship chances.
1. Do something new. It need not always be a major activity. Sometimes, even a simple note of thanks or expression of endearment such as “take care” “see you tonight” may surprise your partner and sets a different atmosphere or mood. At times, going out on a walk or watching a movie together can be a good bonding opportunity.
2. Plan a getaway vacation. Some time spent with your partner in another environment can help ease the tension. In fact, it can be a great way to express your love for your partner especially when you are away from pressures from your respective career, friends, family, children and domestic concerns. Read More→
